Karamö, le prof virtuelLeçon 15 sur 15
Paragraph writing: writing about past actions
Je sais rédiger au BAC un paragraphe clair et correct qui raconte des actions passées, avec une phrase d'introduction, des phrases de développement bien reliées et une conclusion.
- 1 h
- 6 exercices corrigés
- 1 schéma
- QCM de 5 questions
À la fin de la leçon, tu sauras :
- Construire un paragraphe (topic sentence, supporting sentences, concluding sentence)
- Employer correctement les temps du passé (past simple, past continuous, past perfect, used to)
- Relier les actions avec des connecteurs chronologiques
- Analyser un sujet, planifier et relire sa production dans le temps de l'examen
Avant de commencer : Les 12 temps de l'anglais (surtout le passé), les verbes irréguliers, les conjonctions, les conditionnels de type 3 et l'expression du regret.
1Je découvre
À trois semaines du BAC, le professeur d'anglais du lycée de Faranah donne ce sujet d'entraînement à sa classe :
« Write a paragraph of about 10 lines about the best day of your holidays. »
Kadiatou commence aussitôt : « My holidays was very good. I go to Kankan. I see my grandmother. It is fantastic. » Elle s'arrête : elle a déjà fini ses idées, et elle sent que quelque chose ne va pas.
Le professeur lit par-dessus son épaule : « Tu as des idées, mais tu racontes le passé au présent, tes phrases ne sont pas reliées et on ne sait pas ce qui s'est passé ce jour-là. Un paragraphe, ce n'est pas une liste de phrases : c'est une petite histoire organisée. »
Au BAC, la dernière partie de l'épreuve d'anglais est souvent une production écrite courte : un paragraphe sur un sujet personnel, fréquemment au passé (un souvenir, un événement, un voyage, une expérience). C'est une partie où l'on peut gagner beaucoup de points avec une bonne méthode.
Comment écrire un paragraphe bien construit qui raconte des actions passées, sans erreurs de temps ?
2Je comprends
1. Qu'est-ce qu'un paragraphe ?
Un paragraphe est un bloc de texte qui développe une seule idée principale. Il a trois parties :
- la topic sentence (phrase d'introduction) : elle annonce le sujet et donne le ton ;
- les supporting sentences (phrases de développement) : elles racontent les actions ou donnent les détails, dans l'ordre ;
- la concluding sentence (phrase de conclusion) : elle termine, donne un sentiment, une leçon ou un regret.
Un paragraphe d'examen fait souvent 8 à 12 lignes ; respecte toujours la longueur demandée.
- 1Topic sentence : j'annonce l'événement (quand, où, quoi). « Last August, I spent the best day of my holidays in Kankan. »
- 2Supporting sentence 1 : ce qui s'est passé d'abord. « Early in the morning, my uncle took me to the market… »
- 3Supporting sentences 2 et 3 : la suite, avec des détails et des connecteurs. « Then… While we were…, … After that… »
- 4Concluding sentence : sentiment, leçon, souhait. « I will never forget that day. »
2. Les temps du récit au passé
| Temps | Emploi dans le récit | Exemple |
|---|---|---|
| past simple | les actions principales, qui se suivent | We arrived at noon. We ate rice and sauce. |
| past continuous | le décor, une action en cours interrompue | It was raining when we left. While we were eating, my cousin arrived. |
| past perfect | une action antérieure à une autre action passée | I had never seen the Niger before that day. |
| used to + base | une habitude passée qui n'existe plus | When I was a child, I used to spend my holidays in Dalaba. |
| would have + p.p. | imaginer un passé différent, regret | If I had stayed longer, I would have visited more places. |
Le past simple est le temps principal : n'utilise pas le présent pour raconter. Révise les verbes irréguliers les plus fréquents : *go/went, see/saw, take/took, come/came, eat/ate, buy/bought, meet/met, feel/felt, spend/spent, leave/left, begin/began, find/found*.
3. Les connecteurs chronologiques
- Début : First, At first, In the morning, Early in the morning, One day, Last year
- Suite : Then, Next, After that, Later, A few minutes later, Afterwards
- Simultanéité : While, When, As, Meanwhile
- Brusquement : Suddenly, All of a sudden
- Fin : Finally, In the end, At last, In the evening
Attention : at the end (à la fin de quelque chose : at the end of the day) ≠ in the end (finalement).
4. Rendre le paragraphe vivant
- Donne des détails concrets : lieux (the Madina market, the banks of the Milo), personnes, sensations (It was hot and dusty).
- Exprime des sentiments : I was excited / nervous / proud / disappointed.
- Varie les phrases : une phrase courte après une longue, une conjonction (because, although, so), une question rhétorique.
- Termine par une leçon ou un regret : That day taught me that… / I wish I had taken photos.
Méthode
Pour réussir le paragraphe du BAC (environ 20 minutes) :
- Je lis le sujet deux fois et je souligne : le thème, le temps demandé, la longueur (number of lines / words).
- Je note en 2 minutes un plan au brouillon : topic sentence, 3 ou 4 actions dans l'ordre, conclusion.
- J'écris la topic sentence : quand, où, quoi.
- Je rédige les actions au past simple, le décor au past continuous, l'antériorité au past perfect, avec des connecteurs.
- J'écris une conclusion : sentiment, leçon ou regret.
- Je relis en vérifiant : les verbes au passé (irréguliers), les -s, les majuscules, la ponctuation, la longueur.
Exemple
Subject: Write a paragraph (about 10 lines) about an important event in your life.
Plan : topic (le jour où j'ai reçu mes résultats du BEPC) → matin, attente → annonce à la radio → réaction de la famille → conclusion.
Paragraph:
The happiest day of my life was the day I got my BEPC results. That morning, I was so nervous that I could not eat anything. My whole family was sitting around the radio in the living room because the results were going to be announced. Suddenly, the speaker read the name of my school, and a few minutes later, he read my name. At first, I could not believe it, but my mother started to shout with joy and my little brothers began to dance. In the afternoon, our neighbours came to congratulate me, and my father offered me a new schoolbag. I had worked hard for months, and that day I understood that effort always pays. I will never forget it.
Exemple
Correct Kadiatou's beginning: « My holidays was very good. I go to Kankan. I see my grandmother. It is fantastic. »
Erreurs : holidays est pluriel → were ; récit au passé → went, saw, was ; phrases non reliées.
Improved version: My holidays were wonderful. In July, I went to Kankan to visit my grandmother, whom I had not seen for two years. When I arrived, she was sitting in front of her house, and she was very surprised to see me. It was a fantastic moment.
5. Écrire au passé un souvenir d'habitude ou un regret
Deux variantes fréquentes des sujets :
- Une habitude passée : Describe what you used to do when you were a child. → used to + base, would + base, past simple : Every Sunday, we used to go to the river. My grandfather would tell us stories.
- Un regret ou un passé imaginé : Imagine you had not passed your BEPC. What would have happened? → type 3 : If I had failed, I would have repeated the 10th grade… Garde bien la structure if + past perfect, would have + p.p. dans tout le paragraphe.
6. La grille de relecture
| Je vérifie… | Exemple de faute à corriger |
|---|---|
| les verbes au passé | I go → I went |
| les irréguliers | I buyed → I bought |
| l'accord sujet-verbe | My holidays was → were |
| les connecteurs | pas seulement and… and… and |
| la ponctuation | une majuscule après chaque point |
| la longueur | ni trop court, ni hors sujet |
3Je retiens
Je retiens
Paragraphe = topic sentence (quand, où, quoi) + supporting sentences (actions dans l'ordre) + concluding sentence (sentiment, leçon, regret).
Past simple = actions principales ; past continuous = décor ou action interrompue ; past perfect = action antérieure ; used to = habitude passée.
Connecteurs : first, then, after that, while, suddenly, finally, in the end.
Regret ou passé imaginé : if + past perfect, would have + p.p. ; I wish I had + p.p.
Méthode : lire le sujet, planifier au brouillon, rédiger, relire (verbes, accords, ponctuation, longueur).
4Erreurs fréquentes
- Raconter au présent : dans un récit passé, on écrit « I went to Kankan », pas « I go to Kankan ».
- Régulariser un verbe irrégulier : « I bought », « we ate », « she took », pas « I buyed », « we eated », « she taked ».
- Écrire une liste de phrases sans lien : relie les actions avec then, after that, while, when, because.
- Oublier la conclusion ou dépasser largement la longueur demandée : le correcteur évalue aussi l'organisation.
5Je m’exerce
1Exercice 1
Put the verbs in brackets in the correct past tense.
*Last Saturday, I (1. wake) up early because we (2. plan) a trip to the Kinkon waterfall. While we (3. drive) on the road, it (4. start) to rain. When we (5. arrive), the other visitors (6. already / leave).*
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
(1) woke (2) had planned (antérieur au réveil) (3) were driving (action en cours) (4) started (5) arrived (6) had already left (antérieur à notre arrivée)
2Exercice 2
Put these sentences in the correct order to make a paragraph, then underline the topic sentence and the concluding sentence.
a) After that, we visited the old market and bought some souvenirs.
b) I will always remember that trip with my classmates.
c) Last year, our school organised a trip to Kindia.
d) First, we went to the fruit research centre, where a guide explained how mangoes are grown.
e) In the evening, we came back to Conakry, tired but happy.
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
Order: c) → d) → a) → e) → b).
Topic sentence: c) Last year, our school organised a trip to Kindia. Concluding sentence: b) I will always remember that trip with my classmates.
3Exercice 3
Complete the paragraph with suitable connectors: suddenly, while, then, finally, when, first.
*... I left home, the sun was shining. ..., I went to the bakery to buy bread. ... I was paying, ... I heard a loud noise outside: a car had hit a motorbike. People ran to help the driver. ..., an ambulance arrived. ..., everybody went back to work.*
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
*When I left home, the sun was shining. First, I went to the bakery to buy bread. While I was paying, suddenly I heard a loud noise outside: a car had hit a motorbike. People ran to help the driver. Then, an ambulance arrived. Finally, everybody went back to work.*
(When et while introduisent une subordonnée de temps ; suddenly marque l'événement brusque ; first, then, finally ordonnent les actions.)
4Exercice 4
Correct the mistakes in this paragraph (eight mistakes).
*Last month, my father buyed a new motorbike. The next day, we go to Mamou to visit my aunt. While we was travelling, it begun to rain. We stoped under a big tree. My aunt were very happy when she see us. We spend two days with her.*
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
*Last month, my father bought a new motorbike. The next day, we went to Mamou to visit my aunt. While we were travelling, it began to rain. We stopped under a big tree. My aunt was very happy when she saw us. We spent two days with her.*
Les huit fautes : buyed → bought ; go → went ; was → were ; begun → began ; stoped → stopped ; were → was ; see → saw ; spend → spent.
5Exercice 5
(BAC format, paragraph writing) Write a paragraph of about 10 lines on this topic:
« Describe a day when you helped someone. Say what happened, what you did, and how you felt. »
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
Example answer:
*Last rainy season, I helped an old woman in my neighbourhood, and it was one of the best days of my life. It had rained all night, and the road near our house was flooded. On my way to school, I saw an old woman who was trying to cross the road with a heavy basket of cassava. She was afraid of falling into the water. First, I took her basket and put it on my head. Then I held her hand and we crossed the road slowly. When we reached the other side, she thanked me and prayed for my success. I arrived at school a little late, but my teacher forgave me when I explained what had happened. That day, I felt proud and useful, and I understood that a small action can make someone happy.*
6Exercice 6
Write a paragraph of 8 to 10 lines beginning with: If I had known that the exam would be so easy, … Use the third conditional and at least two connectors.
Voir le corrigéCacher le corrigé
Example answer:
*If I had known that the exam would be so easy, I would have slept better the night before. I was so worried that I revised until two o'clock in the morning. As a result, I was very tired when I arrived at the exam centre. If I had gone to bed earlier, I would have felt more relaxed, and I would have written my answers more carefully. Moreover, I would not have forgotten my calculator at home. Finally, I passed, but this experience taught me that rest is as important as revision.*
Cherche d’abord seul, sur ton cahier, puis ouvre le corrigé pour comparer.
6Je vérifie
Choisis une réponse pour chaque question : la correction s’affiche aussitôt.
Crée ton compte élève gratuit pour cocher les leçons terminées, suivre ta progression et gagner des points au QCM.
Toutes les leçons de Anglais · Terminale SE
Leçon ajoutée par Kharandi pour compléter le programme de la classe.
